Archive | September, 2012

Sometimes I Feel Like I Don’t Have a Partner…

21 Sep

When I drive home from work there is often a laundry list of things running through my head, the first being will this traffic ease up so that I can make it to my daughter’s school by 6 p.m., what does the house look like, crap did I leave the coffee pot on, and so on and so on. Lately my thoughts have drifted off to what it was like for me to be a new mom. Let me tell you it was really lonely.

Sure I had a loving boyfriend (now husband) who was there to support me, but it was really lonely because no one I knew had a new baby. I was 25 years old, many of my friends where not even thinking about having kids or even understood what it meant to be a parent.

Random 20-something friend: “What do you mean you can’t come kick it at Kitty’s on Wednesday night?”

Me: “I can’t drink, and I need to feed the kid every hour.”

Random 20-something friend: “Just slip away for an hour then.”

I would get suckered into going out, only to have to run away dripping milk down my cute top. There is nothing more awkward than having men who you have never dated but only hung out with, point out that you are having your own private wet t-shirt contest. Not to mention your boobs are no so big that everyone is interested in them and asking you if you got a boob job… psst it’s the milk you dumb ass.

When I actively went looking for moms in the Bay Area, I was met with 40-year-old moms who were jugging a CEO position with finding a nanny.. I couldn’t relate. I ended up hanging out with a bunch of newly graduated Berkeley High School moms (one who I am still really good friends with today) but they were my little sister’s age.

Today is a different story, it seems like everyone around me is pregnant or just had a baby. I can’t but feel jealous that these friends can turn to each other for advise. They can even plan fun things together. I was even invited to a “Mommy and Me” outdoor rave! Don’t get me started on Baby Loves Disco Where was all this cool stuff when I was a new mom????

But it is the nature of the beast, people have stopped partying and started popping out kids – of course they are going to want to make things fun. It was in this thought rampage over the Richmond/San Rafael bridge that it hit me – this is where I can find my place. Just like I have become the girlfriend who tells you about infant toy product recalls (since I have lived through years of them at this point) and what private schools are a hot mess (don’t get me started on that one) – I can be the blogger who helps spread the word of what “Hipster Parents” (can’t believe I am writing that out, smh) are doing. I can rejoice in the creativity of my friends and their new broods.

So my dear readers, I strive to keep it up and focus on the things I wish I had when I was a new parent and embrace the movement. Cue “Under the Bridge”!!!!